Sadkhin Complex-day 2

So...I figured out why they call it the SADkhin complex. A:because it depresses the shit out of you; B:because as you watch all your friends eat normal food you feel not only hunger but sadness. Looking back about 3 days ago I wish someone...ANYONE...would have said "hey! You're fine the way you are! Don't do this insane diet! You eat way too much to do this! It'll make you sick and you will feel like shit and want to eat the dog..." I don't literally want to eat my dog but the idea of a hot dog is making it pretty impossible to think. This was the worst idea ever and I am regretting it very much so. I have a feeling I have wasted $150.00 and that does not make me happy. I wish I could just be satisfied with the way I look so that I can actually enjoy life instead of watching everyone else enjoy it for me. I know food does not equal happiness but when you eat because you're happy or bored or sad or, in my case, all of the above then it is a staple in your everday life. I am trying hard to think of the end result and praying that will be what gets me through this awful fucking diet. I cheated a little today by putting sweetner in my coffee and tea (I am allowed to use these things but not really encouraged until after the first 10 days) and I had a breadtick at dinner and I ate my veggie part of the day after 6 (it was like 7). I feel the only true way I cheated was the breadstick but I am at peace with it because I am currently hating my life. Dramatic you might say? Well you only eat fruits n veggies (1 1/2 lbs to be EXACT) for 2 days and then come call me dramatic to my face. Tomorrow is my first of 2 milk days (up to 2 1/2 glasses of whole milk as my meal) so I am excited for these next 2 days of awesomeness!! No longer do I "LOVES IT"...2 days down and 10 to go. (Should be 8 but just my luck my doctor will be out of town so I'm having to endure this amazing life decision for an extra 2 days...yay!!!!) HATES IT! ***